What is waking you up in the middle of the night? Is there something on your mind that is bothering you? What is this feeling deep inside you? We all have our own trauma and how we can deal with things. I used to avoid, avoid, avoid them, and hope they would go away. Or push them deep down like they do not exist until everything comes bursting up to the surface. We all have things that bother us and things we need to get over. Is it too late to get over this stuff? No, we can fight anything and get what we want. The toughest things can be thinking that life can be sunny after you have had to go through so much shit. There will always be sun just like there will always be the mud that tries to keep you stuck. We need to forgive ourselves for anything we have done in the past that may have upset us or still bothers us to this day. Please release it all because you are ok and deserve to move on. By releasing and accepting your part in whatever role you played you are taking accountability for your part. You understand what you have done and learned your lesson. You can move on and know the sun will come out for you tomorrow. It does not have to have to be grey and rainy every day of the year. We think that the things we do make us monsters, and they may us monsters that is true. They at least will shed a light on something that is real. In a society that can show us manipulating our best moments and removing any bad ones shedding a light on anything negative that we do would be horrible for us. We must never let the secrets come out. That is what I feel like plenty of people are saying and doing. That scares me because everybody has terrible things they wish did not happen. Choices that we hoped we would not make but made. Again, depending on the choice and the judgement you could call us monsters for doing the sad thing. The thing is you can always make up for the things you feel you ruin in life. You can always be there for someone or make a difference in someone’s life. The problem always becomes when we ignore the negative things that we do, and we just continue to do them like a big loop. Then it can become chaotic and scary to be around this. Even if we do not want to assume any fault, please try to see what part you could have played in it. Being strong will always mean being able to admit where you are weak and knowing we do not have all the answers. If you feel like you are a monster, try to look at yourself. Think about what is one thing you would differently to be kinder? What is one thing you can show the world that we might not know about you?
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