Lets get Personal, Personal!

What happens when everything you thought you believe in changes and life changes around you? I personally experienced what I felt were gaslighting, bullying, abusive moments lately and life has just seemed off. Everything is ok but feels off at the same time. When I have always supported the person that is the underdog going against all odds, because that is how I felt for myself at moments in my life. I now keep to myself. I have not enjoyed talking or trying to connect with others in a long time. WHile, I always felt different from everyone else and had to fight and still fight my own personal battles. Its hard when I want the best for myself but seem to be struggling. People in the world are always going through something, and I am no different. I know I can relate to others in the fact that I have problems just like everyone else. Others come to me for advice. I do not have anyone for me to go to, though. I do not have any friends in the city I live in now and I am distant currently from my family. What I want myself and others to know is to always bring out your own authentic self, even if it feels scary. It may upset people, isolate you, give negative perceptions from others, but who cares. It is more important to be who I am meant to be than it is to fit into some box society has for me. When you go outside that box you will get hit, criticized, but it is all for a better purpose. You can finally be able to truly identify with who you are. While, I am a passionate, caring, sensitive, thoughtful, funny person and its time to start my life the right way. I am just now starting at age 37 to understand myself and who I actually am. I have seen those commercials or postings on the internet that state so and so did this at age 40, age 50, etc. It is never too late to be passionate and start learning about yourself and who you are. Some people know who they are by age 18, and some people never actually get to discover who they are. That is the real shame to me. I would hate never actually knowing who I was, what I stood for, what gets me excited to live each day. We only have a small window to make the best out of our life before it gone. I am happy to say that I am making progress at making my world a better place to live in. What I wish for myself going forward is to continue to question things when they feel off, continue to investigate why things happen the way they do, be mindful of others and their feelings, make sure you are always doing the best you can to support yourself and the ones around you that you care about. I have felt like an outsider my entire life, but only now am I realizing that it is something positive.